Wicked Quickies Page 3
QUICKIE HOT TIP
If you don’t have a pickup truck, you can try the hood of your car. That will work just as well, but be aware of how much weight you put on the hood without bending it out of shape.
42: A RAVENOUS FEAST
Risqué Level
Create your own epicurean erotica scene. Keep the wine flowing and, for good measure, throw in some aphrodisiacs such as chocolate and oysters. Skip cleaning up the dishes once in a while and go right to dessert—devouring each other. After a hot meal, keep the warmth flowing and satiate each other right there at the dining room table.
“Sometimes my husband and I tempt each other with scrumptious treats—using our bodies as dinnerware! I mean, who needs a spoon when you have a tongue?” –Maria, 33
43: INTO THE WILD
Risqué Level
Whether you’re in your own backyard or on a true getaway, pitching a tent for two can bring you closer together in more ways than one. Being near the earth, but slightly shielded from it in a tent, feels nice and natural. Get a small enough tent, and you’ll be forced to cling to one another—and while you’re clinging, you might as well get busy on your erotic adventure. For extra snuggling, squeeze into one sleeping bag, zip off your clothes, and zip up for the night.
“My girlfriend isn’t a big fan of the great outdoors—bugs, wild animals, no TV!—but I can talk her into it once in a while. I just have to make sure that I take good care of her needs while we’re out there, like learning how to roast her ‘marsh mallow’ the right way!” –Kevin, 27
44: HOT SEAT
Risqué Level
Your partner will be happy to have a quiet moment of porch reading interrupted if you let him know what you want. Sit in his lap, and ease your skirt up to your waist—it’s a great angle for deep penetration, and you’ll get a workout using the arms of the chair as leverage to lift yourself up and down. Guys, this quickie gives you the best seat in the house.
QUICKIE HOT TIP
This is a great position for whispering sweet nothings in your lover’s ear—always a great addition to any sexual encounter.
45: FLAMBÉ
Risqué Level
Ignite your lover’s desire with carnal concoctions. Guys, you can throw her up on the counter and ravage her with succulent kisses; or ladies, you can push him up against the stove, grabbing, stroking, or sucking him until he’s well done. Serve yourself up on the kitchen table and call it a five-star meal.
“There’s something about the heat of cooking that really turns me on. Although I might be craving food when I first start, if my husband comes into the kitchen, it turns into this animalistic hunger that makes me take him right there!” –Jane, 36
46: AT THE CAR WASH
Risqué Level
There’s nothing like a quickie with a timer! Pull up to the automatic car wash and punch in an order for the longest, most detailed wash you can find. As you slide your car into the bay, slide off your clothes. The darkness and gentle hum of the washers drown out the rest of the world. But once the dryer starts, your adventure needs to end, or others in the parking lot may see more than they bargained for through your shiny clean windows.
QUICKIE HOT TIP
For maximum privacy, choose an automatic car wash without attendants and try to go when the streets are relatively quiet. For a more heart-pounding, stealthy style, hit the wash in broad daylight with a line of cars behind you, letting the rush to the finish boost your adrenaline.
47: I DO…WANT YOU
Risqué Level
There’s just something about weddings that brings out a spark in all of us. After the bride and groom declare their undying love, find a secluded spot to declare your passion. A hidden alcove at the reception hall, an unused ballroom, an empty hospitality suite at the hotel, a stand of trees away from the outdoor celebration—the options are endless. If there’s a dance, use the power ballads as an excuse to rub up against each other before you scurry off. If you time it right, you can cap off your hurried-up honeymoon with a decadent slice of cake.
QUICKIE ETIQUETTE
Don’t be that couple at someone else’s wedding. This is not the time to play out your public fantasies. Save them for a day when there’s no chance of a bride bringing down her wrath upon you, and stick to secluded areas.
48: BOLD ON THE BALCONY
Risqué Level
Give the birds something to chirp about. Sure, there’s a king-size bed in the middle of that hotel room, but who wants to mess up the sheets? Slide the balcony door open, and step outside for some quick satisfaction. Not many prying eyes to worry about when you’re seven stories in the air, so bare it all and let the wind make you shiver before your partner does.
QUICKIE HOT TIP
If you’re in a crowded neighborhood, toss on a fluffy robe. Unless they’re behind a pair of binoculars, prying eyes will just think you’re enjoying the view. And you are…
49: LIVE IT UP IN THE LIMO
Risqué Level
You may have to shell out some cash, but you’ll get a more private space than you would in a cab. That partition will block out the driver, and the tinted windows will block out the world. Better yet, the leather seats give you plenty of room to rip off your clothes and savor the occasion. Spread out and see how much pleasure you can have before the limo pulls to a stop.
QUICKIE HOT TIP
While you can always tell the driver to cruise around, amp up the excitement by giving him a short route. The urgency to get busy before you reach your destination will make the experience even hotter.
50: SEX IN THE STACKS
Risqué Level
Quiet, bookish types beware—this one requires some gusto. Long reserved for silent reading and research, libraries are the perfect place to indulge in extracurricular activities. Select a secluded area, and reenact your favorite parts of the Kama Sutra. For added ambiance, find the erotica section and read each other a few steamy passages. You never know, you might find some inspiration…
QUICKIE ETIQUETTE
Choose your location wisely here. A larger library will boast a larger number of hidden corners and dusty stacks, and perhaps even some study carrels to balance on as you study anatomy.
51: MILE HIGH MADNESS
Risqué Level
Sure, joining the traditional mile-high club means heading to the bathroom for a crowded encounter, but why not start the adventure from the comfort of your seat? Spread out a blanket, and let your hands roam free. On overnight flights, the lights will dim, concealing your furtive exploration further. Your partner could even lay in your lap, feigning sleep for any curious passerby. When you just can’t take it anymore, rush to the rear of the plane and join the club in a fit of frantic bumping and grinding.
QUICKIE ETIQUETTE
This quickie is best accomplished when you and your partner are in a row by yourselves. To add to the atmosphere, upgrade yourselves to first class and let the bubbly take you away.
52: WORKING UP A SWEAT
Risqué Level
Running can be an excellent workout, but don’t let the end of your jog mean the end of your exertion. With sweat dripping down your bodies and wet shirts clinging, cap off the cardio with a quickie. For a little more adventure, abandon those treadmills for an outdoor run, and flash your partner halfway through to lure him off the jogging trail. You may be too tired to run back home, but your heart rate will be soaring and your satisfaction guaranteed.
QUICKIE HOT TIP
Slide into the shower together afterward for an extension of your exercise, and remember to help each other cool down so you don’t pull any important muscles.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Audacia Ray is an executive editor of $pread magazine, community manager of the PEEQ.com, and author of Naked on the Internet: Hookups, Downloads, and Cashing In on Internet Sexploration. She also directed and produced The Bi Apple, an award-winning adult film. Audacia lives in Brooklyn, New York. To learn more about her,
please visit her website: www.WakingVixen.com.
Table of Contents
Wicked Quickies
Introduction
1: The Hump Seat
2: Sit and Spin
3: A Shave and a BJ
4: Fellatio Phone Call
5: Early Bird Special
6: Box Lunch
7: Wake-up Call
8: Back Alley Shag
9: Powder Room Petting
10: Manual Transmission
11: The (Un)Dressing Room
12: Fervent Footsie
13: Seductive Stairwell
14: Amorous Office
15: Getting Wet
16: Halftime Show
17: Bathtub Booty
18: Morning Detour
19: Morning Makeover
20: Taxicab Confessions
21: Coatroom Canoodle
22: Diner's Delight
23: Sexercise Schtupp
24: The Grass is Always Greener
25: Beachcomber Booty
26: Midnight Snack
27: Elevator "Emergency"
28: Aquatic Arousal
29: Afternoon Delight
30: Office memo
31: Kwiky Car Wash
32: Stairway to Heaven
33: Summertime Quencher
34: Quiet Rapture
35: Heavy Petting
36: The Naughty Hairbrush
37: A Sneak Preview
38: The Great Outdoors
39: Corner Pocket
40: King of the World
41: Truckin'
42: A Ravenous Feast
43: Into the Wild
44: Hot Seat
45: Flambé
46: At the Car Wash
47: I Do…Want You
48: Bold on the Balcony
49: Live it Up in the Limo
50: Sex in the Stacks
51: Mile High Madness
52: Working Up a Sweat
About the Author